one mo' daaaay!

one more flippppin daaay!

the past few days in south carolina leave me no reason to come back here.

but when i do come back i will be a different person not just mentally but physically. just watchh!

im pretty excited to see my family and spend time with my mom. and it'll do me good to get away from certain people around here.

but i will try to write everyday and let yall know whats uppp!

(:



I CANNNT WAIT! (:

day ninee.

- someone you wish you could meet...

hmm, i wish i could meet my 'true love'

i know that he is out there somewhere and i want to meet him...

(:

anywaaays

today would have been 2 yearrs and 5 months since me and bobby started dating. i miss him!

but i have a few things to get off my cheast!

how come when you tell someone the truth, they get there feelings hurt but when you lie to them and tell them what they want to hear, you are the good person? i dont understand?!

and another thing,

im not perfect and i say things that i mean in a different way then you take them so b4 you start running your mouth how about ask me about it... grow some balls and ask mee! (:

i mean this is MY blog and im going to write WHATEVER i want. regardless if you like it or not. you dont have to read MY blog. once again its MINE!

&& last thinggggg,

immmm happpy thaaanks to this boy!

last night was GREAT! and i never wanted it to end.

im glad we are good again bc i sure have missed him

<3

'up outttt my faceeeee' <-- clickkkk

daaay eightt.

Favorite 'Internet' Friend...

welll, i don't really have anyone thats just an internet friend so i don't have a favorite.

buttt, i have 13 days until i leave this place. here lately i cant wait for those 13 days to pass. my life has been hell. the only people that have been making this decision harder is my family. and thats it.

i get traded, ditched, and lied to by everyone else. thats why im leaving here!

im tired of being put in 2nd place, if you cared about me at all you wouldnt put me there.if you really wanted me to stay here then i think you would be spending as much time as possible with me while you have the chance. because come july 23rd you wont have the chance. im really done with you this time. im tired of all the pain i have to go through just to try to be someone special and mean something to you. i cant take it anymore. its going to hurt sooo much but its something that i have got to do. i prayed so had last night that you would fall in love with me like ive fell for you. i just want to be happy and when im with you, im happy!

but in the end, the lonely nights where you would rather be with another girl, are not worth it anymore.

maybe one day you will realze what you lost and maybe by then i can treat you like you have been treating me. but in the end, everyone deserves to be happy. & i wish the same for you.

i'm going to miss you AMM.

even though i really love you, i'm going to smile bc i deserve to...

daaay sevennn.

My EX; Bobby Lowe

wellll, where do i begin?

its was december 18, 2007 when i met bobby for the first time. i remember this night like it was just a few weeks ago. when i saw him the feeling i got was a feeling that i have never experenced before. it was like one of those slow motion movies, it was perfect. i remember me and raley were walking around at sandhills and i saw him sitting in front of nestle. we had talked on myspace plenty of time but it was never anything serious. but when i looked into his eyes everything changed!

from that moment i knew bobby wasnt going to be just another boy. i was 15 years old and everyone told me that i didnt know what 'love' was. but i did, i knew that i loved bobby and i didnt care what anyone else said or thought about him, i loved him, every single piece of him.

at the time bobby was hanging out with the wrong crowd and he was on drugs really bad. my parents didnt approve of that at all so they told him that he pretty much had to chose between me and drugs... when they told him that deep in my heart i knew that me and him were done! but he told them that he promised that he would quit! & he did! 

Feburary 11th, 2008 bobby asked me to be his girlfriend. without any hesitation i said YES! & thats where my life began. bobby was amazing. he was one persone that i could always count on. he had my back no matter what. he knew how to make he feel loved and wanted. he made me feel good about myself. he was everything that i wanted and more. soon after we started dating bobby pretty much moved in with me, we were perfect!

well until may 30,2010, we broke up.

we both agreed that we were going to take a break and try to work things out, well they never worked out and we both moved on. well he moved on, i never moved on. i wanted him back more then anything i was willing to do whatever it took to have him back. after over 2 years of being with one person, you cant just get over them.

well he started dating someone as soon as me and him broke up. deep down i was happy for him bc i always wanted him happy!

on January 30th 2010 bobby commited suicide. thats the day 2 lifes were taken, mine and his. im still on this earth but i'll never 'live' again. he was my reason for being here and now he's gone. i have tried and tried to move on but i cant i keep getting hurt and i think if bobby was here this wouldnt be happening to me, but i have to wake up and realize bobbys not here and never will be. i still to this day cry about him. he didnt deserve to die! he deserved to be here more then i did. why didnt god take me instead? why didnt bobby call me when he was feeling upset? why dont anyone know why he killed hisself? i have so many unanwsered questions! 

i know that bobby is in heaven and he's my angel bc without him watching over me and protecting me, i wouldnt be here right now. i love you angel!

RIP BOBBY LOWE

10/14/1990- 1/30/2011

i love and miss you

- your babygirl<3